As the pandemic wore on, we were really getting on each other’s nerves. I realized we needed a new approach.
My husband and I have been together for almost 20 years. We have very different personalities and communication styles. I’m an extrovert who talks quickly—some might say “blurts.” He’s a quiet guy who carefully considers each word before speaking. I am impulsive; he’s more thoughtful. Over the years this has led to misunderstandings, hurt feelings and many,Once, when we were first dating, he showed me a pair of glasses he was thinking of buying.
And, as the pandemic wore on, we were really getting on each other’s nerves. After another squabble about something stupid that spiralled into a fight about every past wrong, current annoyance and one another’s ingrained character flaws, we needed a new approach. I’m not sure who came up with this method , but we’ve been doing it for about a year and have found it useful.
But, by asking the other person to withhold their immediate reaction, we circumvent that first impulsive, negative blurt. Instead, the person being presented with the idea is forced to robotically nod and say something along the lines of, “Okay. Let us discuss this later.
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