BMW X5M (E70) | The Brave Pill

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BMW X5M (E70) | The Brave Pill
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An M version of an X car. But not that one...

of the Lamborghini Countach, one wearing a bold £69,995 pricetag, which received a welcome in the comments about as enthusiastic as one that would be given to an unidentified brown object floating in a swimming pool., one which earned a critical reaction similar to that which would be given to a rapidly spreading brown slick in a swimming pool carrying a tide of rabid rats. At the time of going to pixel there are 387 comments and close to a record low PH rating of 1.

To be fair, speed was something that the E70-generation X5M was never short of. The first decade of the millennium saw what history is already regarding as a morally reprehensible power race between the makers of big, expensive SUVs. The Porsche Cayenne Turbo kicked things off in 2002, when it reached a slightly shocked market with 450hp and the ability to sprint off the line faster than most genuine sports cars.

While 14 years of hindsight won’t have improved the ride or thirst, our Pill now looks both svelte and dainty when compared to the XM, if maybe nothing else. It is a 2009 car that has covered 125,000 miles in the charge of just two owners. The dealer selling it promises both what appears to be a full kitchen sinking on the spec front, but also a service history including a recent £10,000 engine rebuild.

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