The Onion’s 2020 Grammy Predictions

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The Onion’s 2020 Grammy Predictions
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The 62nd annual Grammy Awards will take place this Sunday, Jan. 26, honoring the best artists, albums, and songs from the past year. Here are The Onion’s predictions for the 2020 Grammy Awards.

Norman Fucking RockwellGrammy voters hope giving the award to Lana Del Rey’s album will make up for their notorious refusal to award a Grammy to Norman Rockwell during his life.Even though his guitar was really out of tune and he kept screwing up the F barre chord, Tim Langdon gave his all to his audience, disinterested Boy Scout Troop 244.

Billie Eilish’s smash hit showed music fans that whispering isn’t dead.Look, Michelle Obama reading her book into a microphone is obviously going to win, but what’s our definition of “album,” here, exactly?The genre-bending hit sparked a national conversation about what can be classified as country music and whether anything means anything and what we’re all even doing here on this melting rock hurtling through space.

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