'Dining out with kids is a great way to practice talking in angry whispers'
WHAT MY KID HEARS: please reverse engineer your sandwich until it looks like the earth from which it cameWhy, would; she! do. that?It takes me about three minutes to make my 5yo a peanut butter and jelly sandwich which is coincidentally the exact amount of time it takes my 5yo to decide she doesn’t actually want a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
my son didn't know the name for a clothes hanger so I was pretty confused when he asked me for a pants hookerBabies recognize their mothers' voices in the womb so they can selectively block it when they're older.It’s crazy that it took like 10 months to come up with a covid vaccine but it’s taken ETERNITY and still no one has come up with a sippy cup that doesn’t leak.
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