“Sports culture has just trained us not to complain but to just work harder and do better.”
Maddy Holleran, a track star at the University of Pennsylvania, died by suicide in 2014
. An hour before her death, Maddy posted a photo on Instagram of the view from the parking garage where she would die, showing cozy outdoor lights surrounding a park. The photo gave no indication that anything was wrong. Bushoven remembers their family trying to understand the difference between what Maddy posted on Instagram and what they knew her struggles to be.
Part of Maddy’s story, Bushoven says, is a thread common in that of high-achieving athletes: perfectionism. Maddy was kind, beautiful, funny, and always up for a dare, her sister says. But when she felt she fell short of her goals, her self-criticism could become ruthless. "The pressure is too much,” Bushoven says. “We have to teach [young people] to fail. Failure is inevitable… but so many people are afraid of failure. Maddy was a perfectionist so in her mind, failure wasn’t an option.
Birnie, who says Morgan “played the music and brought everyone to the dance floor with her,” was gutted by thedeaths of Lauren, Katie, and Sarah. “[At Morgan’s Message], we felt like we’d been failing. Like are we even making an impact? What more could we be doing?” The effect was compounded by the fact that both of Morgan’s parents attended James Madison University, where Lauren played.
Kyrah Dailey, 19, knows how close her community came to mourning the way Morgan’s family does. Dailey
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