'Parental guilt is something every single one of us has felt over the years, often repeatedly. Unlike other disabilities we’re convinced if we just make enough rules, talk enough, punish/reward enough, we’re going to fix ADHD given societal norms.'
Your son has a medical condition that manifests in behavioral problems that he can’t help, which is why discipline and convincing won’t work. When your child has a medical condition you treat it like any other one or your child is the one who suffers the most.
Kids with ADHD need to hyperfocus which is why computers/tablets are easy for them to concentrate on. Maturitiy wise your son is on average three years behind his peers. Your 7 yr old may be acting like a 4 yr old. Most kids often suffer from a learning disability or are so overwhelmed with ADHD symptoms that it impedes his school work.
Until my oldest son, who is now 10, was properly diagnosed and began meds and behavioral therapy, I thought I was a failure as a parent. In reality, we are actually better parents because parenting them is so hard! For my younger son, the diagnosis was from his neurologist who found very mild cerebral palsy when he was in K, then dx his ADHD the following year. She thinks it’s secondary to the lesion and won’t recommend medication, but I do wonder sometimes if it isn’t a combination? We’re also using a 504 Plan to accommodate him and it’s helping. I’m now looking for a tutor who will help him with some executive function skills since that seems to be his real weakness in class & at home.
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