No, I (still) won’t let you pick my brain

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No, I (still) won’t let you pick my brain
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Friends don't let friends go out for unnecessary coffee meetings.

TweetShareShare Before the pandemic, at least weekly I would get asked some version of, “Can I pick your brain? I’ll get the tab for your coffee.” With stay home orders and a tricky economy, the requests have become even more frequent.

People who want to “pick your brain” will never hire you Taking “pick your brain” sessions is a common mistake. But the truth is, if someone doesn’t want to pay for an initial meeting – they are not going to hire you later. Don’t count “pick your brain” coffee sessions as business development. You may meet fascinating people, but you will most likely not gain clients.

When you reply, do so with grace and finality. Kick off the money conversation, carefully woo them on the off chance they do want to become a paying client, and state your boundary about not working for free: If someone isn’t a peer in the field, I look to see if there is something else I can gain from the conversation to make it more balanced . It’s easy to say yes to a “pick your brain” session if the person asking is from a fascinating place or generation that I want to know more about. In which case, I reply by saying something like, “yes, let’s meet up. I have wanted to learn about your industry / home country / how someone like you in Gen Z would respond to something I’m putting together.

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