PORTLAND, ME—Mere moments after arriving late to a dinner with friends at Daniel’s Restaurant and Pub, 33-year-old software engineer Gregory Lasman found himself banished to the furthest reaches of the table, sources confirmed Friday. Eyewitness accounts revealed that for the offense of arriving 12 minutes after the…
PORTLAND, ME—Mere moments after arriving late to a dinner with friends at Daniel’s Restaurant and Pub, 33-year-old software engineer Gregory Lasman found himself banished to the furthest reaches of the table, sources confirmed Friday.
Eyewitness accounts revealed that for the offense of arriving 12 minutes after the 7:30pm reservation, Lasman was condemned to the most remote regions of the dining table, leaving him straining to make out a single word of conversation while trapped between his friend’s new girlfriend and someone’s brother who was visiting from out of town.
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