Kicking, Screaming Warren Buffett Dragged From Caesars Palace After Losing Everything At Roulette Wheel

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Kicking, Screaming Warren Buffett Dragged From Caesars Palace After Losing Everything At Roulette Wheel
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LAS VEGAS—Cursing at security officers as he fought their efforts to escort him from the premises, a kicking, screaming Warren Buffett was reportedly dragged from Caesars Palace Hotel and Casino early Wednesday morning after losing his entire fortune playing roulette.

The Berkshire Hathaway chairman, who sources said had been betting almost continuously and in progressively greater amounts since checking into the hotel approximately 12 hours earlier, reportedly squandered $78.7 billion in stocks, bonds, real estate, and liquid assets by the time guards arrived to remove him.

“For a little while, at least, he was riding a really hot hand—I remember around midnight he won four or five $2 billion bets in a row,” croupier Molly Giorgi told reporters, noting that at one point the so-called Oracle of Omaha had attracted the attention of two young women who stood on either side and cheered him on as he collected his winnings.

Witnesses confirmed that as security personnel approached, a disheveled, perspiring Buffett launched into a stream of verbal attacks directed at casino employees, whom he accused of either rigging the wheel or using an “illegal ball.” Buffett reportedly then made a sudden break toward the slot machine area, where he snatched several patrons’ cups of quarters before tripping over his own feet and stumbling into a cocktail waitress.

“I felt bad seeing him take the loss so poorly, but then again I was standing near him when he hit a $10 billion column bet and tucked 2.8 [billion] into my shirt pocket for being his ‘lucky charm,’” said Phoenix-area visitor and now 239th richest person in America, Bob Raskow. “But that’s Vegas for you—it doesn’t matter if you run the fourth-largest public company on the planet, the house always wins.

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