'I’ve learned to slow down, be gentle with myself, and prioritize relationships.' This week's ScienceWorkingLife:
“You should apply!” my mentor exclaimed as they slid the job description across the table. It was for a tenure-track appointment—a position that had been my driving ambition—in the department where I had completed my Ph.D. Professionally, the timing was perfect: My postdoctoral training had expanded my skill set and I had recently received a great score on a grant application, poising me to return to my old digs with a unique niche and the proven ability to fund it.
This discomfort crystallized one fine summer day when I heard a podcast about workism, the doctrine that employment should provide identity, purpose, and community. In a flash of embarrassed comprehension, I realized this term described much of how I had approached my post-Ph.D. life. I viewed studies, grants, collaborations, and impact as integral to my identity rather than to my job, equating personal worth with professional successes.
Then, the tenure-track opportunity arose, and I was torn. Although the changes I had made helped me understand the patterns I wanted to move away from, parts of me were still attracted to the position. I agonized for weeks, talking with anyone who would listen and tossing and turning at night.
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