Turns out your toxic boss can teach you something.
Within that bouquet, there’s of course the mentor whose career you most desire: the manager who always knows the right thing to do, or the executive who models the compassionate, creative kind of leadership to which you most aspire. But right alongside that shining example, there’s also the toxic boss, the two-timing supervisor, and the ladder-climbing co-worker.
“Once we identify that somebody is an anti-mentor, I think we can really learn from that person,” Deitte said. “It’s a learning opportunity for us to reflect, like: ‘This is the type of person I don’t want to be. I see the impact they’re having on the people around them. I don’t want that.’ Then we know what we don’t want to be.”
Anti-mentors help clarify our work values, said Eliana Goldstein, a career coach based in Brooklyn. Sometimes, the things that most motivate and energize us get lost in the humdrum shuffle of a workday. But confronting what you specifically don’t like about working with this anti-mentor can cast what you prioritize most into high relief.
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