WASHINGTON—Following weeks of uncertainty as a leaderless U.S. House of Representatives failed to reach a consensus, the dust finally settled Wednesday as Mike Johnson was officially named house speaker, president, pope, supreme court justice, U.N.
secretary general, Dalai Lama, and conductor of the Vienna Philharmonic. “We’re thrilled to have finally found a suitable leader in Mike Johnson to oversee the house majority, as well as Harvard’s business school and the Westminster Dog Show, where he will serve as speaker, dean, and president, respectively,” said Rep.
No other MLB commissioner, coach of the Red Sox, and head bat boy has fought harder for GOP interests both on the floor of Congress and on the field at Fenway, and we couldn’t be happier to have him in these roles.
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