Psychotherapist Mary Jo Rapini shares some of the most common culprits of your fading spark and how you can work to restore your attraction.
When you first meet your partner, you can’t imagine not feeling attraction for them. The two of you are like magnets drawn to each other. However, years together, work demands, unresolved hurts, stress with daily life, and/ or sexual neglect can make you feel like you’ve lost connection with your partner. Feeling neglected by your partner causes your self-esteem to spiral downward, and unless you attempt to stop the downward spiral, you can find yourself feeling more like roommates than lovers.
Couples who successfully regain their attraction for their partner do so by identifying the underlying issues provoking the loss of attraction. The following issues are the most common culprits of your fading spark:2. You hold on to past anger or hurts.4. You let yourself go; you’re no longer disciplined about taking care of yourself or your appearance.
There are many reasons partners lose attraction to each other, and most of the time the reasons have more to do with what the individual partner is going through than their significant other. Getting back in touch with the underlying reason for the loss and taking responsibility for it is the best way to regain your attraction. Changing partners or ending a relationship because you have fallen out of attraction is ill-advised and rarely effective.
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