Ask Amy: Woman is bothered that her boyfriend frequently references his late wife

He has a pendant of her face on their wedding day hanging in his car.

He has also brought me and his daughter to her grave site, which also includes a photo of him and a burial spot right next to her.

I also need the pendant to be put away. Seeing it all the time really bothers me. He always tells me that I’m the best thing that ever happened to him, but I can’t get past feeling like a second fiddle. This girl spent her life being parented by two troubled people who subjected her to repeated traumas. Thank goodness she has a stable and loving mother in her life, now.I agree with your instincts. Your man needs and deserves therapy in order to process the trauma of his first wife’s death, and all that has flowed from it.

But every time you pick up the check, you are paying for eight people who aren’t in your family unit.

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