Can this mom of two keep her friend struggling with infertility from pulling away?
My college best friend is struggling with infertility and is near the end of the road with multiple rounds of unsuccessful in vitro fertilization . I’ve been there to support her through this, even though we live far from each other. My heart aches for her.I have had two children during the course of her fertility struggles. I have taken great pains to break the pregnancies to her gently, privately and early, but I know it has been difficult for her.
I truly want to honor her feelings and the hardship she has faced, but the truth is that my kids are the most central and important thing in my life right now. It feels strange and strained to avoid references to my family when we interact. I am struggling to know whether authentic friendship is possible here.
I suggested that if she had to delve into a young person’s love life, that she should reword the question, so it doesn’t assume that the person is a heterosexual, maybe instead asking: “Have you found a special someone in your life yet?” She blew me off, saying that if the boy was gay, he would have told her.Last week, I witnessed her doing the same thing to yet another grandson .
I would hope that people who love the young folks in their lives give those youngsters the message that it is okay to be who they are by not assuming they are straight.
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