Americans need to exercise these relational muscles

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Americans need to exercise these relational muscles
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New books from cultural commentators David Brooks and Arthur Brooks offer sage advice about how to pursue the good life. They have much wisdom to share about...

Develop greater happiness by doing what? He believes inner bliss “is a direction, not a destination,” and, therefore, the best we can ever hope for is to become happier. This requires doing specific things calculated to increase enjoyment, satisfaction, and purpose.

Just as the management of emotions can be achieved by using this good-for-bad substitution method, so, too, can haunting memories of past pain be reconstructed and replaced by putting positive spins on life lessons learned from old wounds.

Conversations fulfill their potential only when they are two-way streets marked by parties who engage in lean-in listening and ask questions worded in a way that prompt narrative answers tied to life stories. David believes that by following interactional steps such as these, one can elevate relationship colleagues well beyond their present state of mind by not merely deferring to their thoughts, but instead proactively advancing the flow of ideas in conversation, and tactfully critiquing, and on occasion defying others’ perspectives as a means of helping them process and ultimately take their thoughts to more enlightened vistas.

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