Fearing that spouse will become overweight like his family, a letter-writer drops 'many, many hints about healthy eating.'
1. You override your hint impulse and say what you mean — or bite your tongue. If you’re not sure which route to take, one tiebreaker can be to ask yourself whether you’d appreciate his making such comments to you. It’s long for a mantra, but it works: If it’s useful and worth saying, then it’s worth saying it straight.2. You accept that grown men and women are the ones who decide what they eat and watch.
Think about it. Have your efforts changed his habits? So often, people justify their controlling tendencies as a choice: Do something, or watch your loved one die. So often, though, it’s a false choice, where the real choice is: Enjoy your mate while you can, or nag your mate while you can. And yes, it affects me: We can’t buy a house together or get married because I am afraid to commingle funds with him.
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