Old school, meet older school. Which one would you take home?
Sometimes, putting a twin test together isn't straightforward. A new car arrives and there aren't any obvious rivals, so you end up having to be inventive. This leads to angry comments that, for instance, you're mad for pitting a Rolls-Royce Cullinan against a breezeblock on the pretence that they have similar silhouettes. [Note to self: they do, so organise that one]. This test was a tricky one., but it doesn't have a direct rival.
Both cars are beautifully made, though. They feel stouter than a pint of Guinness and lined with plush leather and a side helping of Alcantara - for the headlining. And some shiny bits. Which is where the S8 bites back, because its metal bits are actual metal. In the M760i, there's a much better chance those shiny bits will be sprayed plastic, which lets the side down a tad. Still, despite this it manages to look more homely.
Does the sense of luxury extend to their road manners? If you're imagining each will drag its door handles, like lumbering knuckles, on the kerb stones of every corner, they don't. In fact, quite unexpectedly, the new S8 drives like a proper, old-school performance car. For a start, it has a 4.0-litre V8. This burbles away in the background or bellows soulfully when you bear down hard on the throttle.
The M760i isn't silent, either. Here, the bulk of the noise percolating through seems to be via the glasshouse - there's a bit more turbulent flutter from the door mirrors and you're more aware of the rumble of other cars and trucks passing by outside. The M760i's own interactions with the road surface are well stifled, though. Well, audibly at least. There's more buzz coming up through the column than there is in the S8 - an issue that I've noticed in Rolls-Royces, too.
I haven't mentioned the N74 V12 engine yet. That's because I thought I'd save the best for last. Because as great as the S8's V8 is - and it is a rich and soulful thing - as Nic Cackett said,"it isn't a V12, is it." A simple observation but a pertinent one. There's something majestic about a V12 that sets it apart from lesser engines - and I include monotone W12s in that observation.